Therapy for Men
Are You A Man Who Could Use Therapeutic Support In Your Life?
Have you gone through a big change in your life that has left you feeling lost and in need of some support?
Do you struggle with expressing how you truly feel and feel frustrated or pissed off more often than you'd like? Does feeling sad or afraid feel somehow unacceptable?
Perhaps your life is in a bit of turmoil at work or home and you are seeking balance and clarity amidst the chaos. Or maybe you don’t know where to turn and need guidance on how to plan your next steps forward.
You may not have considered therapy for men before, but now you find yourself in need of a specialist who can help you see the possibilities for your life from a new perspective. A men’s therapist can help you understand that you don’t have to hide your true feelings to be a real man. You don’t have to go through difficult times alone and unsupported to prove somehow that you are strong.
We All Need To Engage In Regular Self-Care And Self-Respect
Our minds and bodies need rest and can display symptoms of burnout or overwhelm when things get out of balance—which can lead to a lack of motivation, feeling bored, as well as loneliness, anger, or irritability with life altogether. Whether you are in early adulthood or middle age, married or single, gay or straight, white or BIPOC, society can make you feel like having emotions as a man is a liability.
You might punish yourself with negative self-talk for having feelings, but that can lead to bottling up tension and pain, which could flare up into aggression toward yourself or others. Therapy for men can help unravel what is causing you distress in your life, teach you how to recognize and hold space for emotions, and provide you with tools for support now and in the future.
Men Experience Common Pressures And Struggles
Many of our families of origin, as well as society as a whole, perpetuate the idea that men are expected to take care of things on their own and not discuss their fears, sadness, or insecurities. We find ways to survive these mindsets, but like all people, at our core, we long for understanding and compassion. We also hope to figure out what we want in life versus what society tells us we should want.
It can be hard for some men to engage in counseling services or healthy habits that will help with empowerment or self-esteem issues. Some men like to intellectualize their challenges in therapy – talking about and quantifying them for understanding at an abstract and almost scientific level – but then struggle with taking actions that will help make improvements.
Societal And Cultural Stereotypes Take A Toll On All Men
As men, we are all exposed to the same oppressive beliefs that hinder us. The stereotype that men are weak if they ask for help might sound familiar, as well as phrases like "Boys don’t cry” or "Don't be a p***y." These reductive ideas exist within specific demographics as well, like the idea that men of color “shouldn’t make waves” to survive in the world.
Men of color can also encounter racist slights and can often be gaslit for their experiences or feel the need to just “suck it up” and accept it as part of their life. For all men, including BIPOC men, having a safe space to open up and talk to a therapist is so helpful to get their voices heard.
Men’s therapy at my practice can offer a space for you to air your grievances and frustrations, no matter the source or the cause. It can help you become more accepting of your experiences, feel more supported, and understand what you want to achieve in life on a deeper level.
Men’s Therapy Provides A Place Of Safety And Support
Through my practice, you will have the chance to develop emotional awareness and the healthy expression of emotions. When you are aware of what you’re feeling you can accurately express what you want in life and pursue what you want with confidence.
If you feel like you are on the brink of overwhelming stress or that life just feels like too much right now, you don’t have to figure it all out on your own. Working with a skilled therapist who understands the issues that you face as a man will help you gain new perspectives and skill sets that will help you navigate toward the life that you envision for yourself.
I Specialize In Somatic Practices Combined With Talk Therapy
I consider myself a somatic therapist, and this type of therapy incorporates the theories and techniques that tune into your body's reactions to stress and trauma, which can show up as anxiety and depression. Your body can tell you a lot about how you feel day to day, manifesting as pain, discomfort, and symptoms related to panic, like shallow breathing and a rapid heartbeat.
What somatic therapy can do is help re-establish a sense of safety and groundedness in your body so that, over time, you can manage how you physically react to stress. A lot of the techniques involve tuning into body sensations and feelings as you experience distress and utilizing calming, grounding actions like breathing techniques or walking during discussions in therapy. We will determine a plan that works best for you.
I utilize several specific modalities in therapy:
Mindfulness-based therapy for men can help you become more aware of what you’re experiencing. When mindfulness becomes a habit, not only do you have more awareness of your thoughts but also an increased sense of well-being from living in the now. Mindfulness during counseling can also help men understand and express their emotions related to triggering experiences.
Emotionally-focused therapy can help men become more capable of sharing their emotions with others, especially their partners. Focusing on nonviolent communication skills and the root of their issues in therapy, instead of allowing surface feelings like anger and frustration to take hold, can help men have deeper and more intimate relationships with their loved ones.
Men’s therapy at my practice can provide you with a safe space to share your struggles, challenges, and triumphs. With a deeper connection to and acceptance of your emotions in therapy, you will better understand your desires and impulses, and clarify your life goals and purpose. You might have ignored the quiet voice in your head that tells you what you are passionate about, but we can help make that voice much louder and in control of your decisions for living a fulfilling and joyful life.
You Might Still Have Questions Or Concerns About Men’s Therapy…
I am skeptical about the effectiveness of therapy.
The skepticism is understandable. You may wonder if a stranger can understand what's happening in your life in therapy and if anything will actually change and help you find balance. Despite these reservations, many therapeutic modalities are evidence-based for their effectiveness, including somatic treatment.* Sharing your thoughts and feelings with someone who genuinely wants to understand you is a powerful experience. The process of sharing can help you understand and process whatever is troubling your psyche more effectively.
https://www.menshealth.com/health/a60074008/somatic-therapy/
I am worried that talking about my issues in therapy will make things worse.
Therapy can bring up uncomfortable topics and feelings that you may have been afraid to discuss, so this concern is understandable, but this brings up the question: how much more do you want to suffer if what you're doing isn't working for you? I aim to help you navigate these difficult experiences in a supportive environment. The process of healing and inner resolution can be uncomfortable, but confronting these emotions is part of accepting your past and your current situation, and opening the door to significant change.
I am worried that others will judge me for seeing a therapist.
In certain communities and cultures, biases against mental health care unfortunately persist. This judgment compounds the additional societal pressures men experience to independently handle everything life throws at them, without showing or sharing their emotional experiences. But times are changing, we are moving the needle forward, and mental health care is less taboo than it once was. And the truth is, everyone needs help. As humans, we are not solitary individuals and need each other. It can take courage to realize that one needs help and to try something different—and within this courage lies the possibility of transformation.
Let’s Talk About Your Next Chapter In Life
Reach out through my contact form or email me at dj@davidjavate.com to schedule a free 15-minute consultation to learn how therapy for men, both online and in person, can provide a supportive and safe environment to discuss what's been happening in your life and find room for transformation.
Individual therapy sessions are $190 per 50-minute session.
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